I'm a big believer that we have a purpose as unique as our DNA and fingerprint and were created to reign. We grow up.. We change and morph as men, mentally, physically, spiritually and relationally.. (by natures design slower and later in life than women..lol) but, just because we are elite minded, high achievers, go getters and have this ability to disconnect from letting feelings, pain, setbacks and other people's opinions get us or take us out of the pursuit of winning or greatness. However, at some point our mind “plays the tape forward” and a light bulb goes off. We figure out that feelings are temporary and fleeting. Sex, drinking, winning a trophy, getting a new title, buying a new car or house brings happiness. As we mature we start noticing the real players, the legends and solid men aren't so moved by that stuff as they are focused on something bigger than doing and buying stuff as they are destiny and purpose. We then take inventory of ourselves and if we're honest we see that excessive drinking and chasing things is costing us fulfillment. Fulfillment comes from pursuing a purpose!
Success and fulfillment is the product of grit, applied knowledge and wisdom, letting go of anything that's holding us back or down and found faster with the right Coaching! Eleanor Roosevelt nailed it with: “Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.”
I am Clay Worrell and have a PhD in Philosophy, Masters in Counseling but far more important and relevant than passing tests and hanging pieces of paper on the wall is real world experience. I have lived in and through excessive drinking and addiction for more than a decade of my life and was considered hopeless by family, friends, Counselors and ultimately to myself.
I come from a family that began in a 12X60 mobile home where College was never spoken,and barely making a living seemed to be our family's mantra. I was working on the farm from age 9 to buy my school clothes and knew early on I wanted more, much more out of life than just getting by. I was an awarded athlete in football, baseball and martial arts. At age 19 I went into Real Estate and by age 21 had 3 houses: a Mercedes and BMW. Determined to do even more, I jumped into Corporate America. I excelled in sales and was soon promoted to General Manager. At the age of 25 I was the youngest ever to be a GM in the Fortune 100 Companies 68 year history. I took the location that never made a profitable dollar in 8 years, ranked 374 of 378 (4th from the bottom Nationally) to #2 in the Nation in volume won me the top new GM of the year. 10s of millions flowed through the businesses I managed and owned. I made strong six digits and was a top 1% income earner with all the cars, boats, Harleys, Rolexes, Cuban Cigars and travel. A Lot of alcohol and cocaine came with that lifestyle and for years there seemed to be no real negative consequences.
My professional life looked like a story book, but my personal life was a disaster. When the market took a dive I lost my business. My drinking accelerated to the point of me ending up in 25+, 5-7 day Detox Units/ 20+ Hospitals/ 4 Inpatient Treatment Centers/ Jails and feeling utterly hopeless to alcohol addiction 3 suicide attempts. I lived and went to treatment in West Palm Beach, Columbia SC, Austin Texas and Roanoke Virginia with no success in being freed from alcohol. My life's accomplishments and grades in School reflected intelligence, determination, commitment and ability to set and accomplish goals. However, I found as countless millions have the traditional treatment Programs don't work. Period!
My breakthrough came when I used my Training/Coaching experience in Corporate America on myself. I combined all the “keys” learned in the different Program Treatment Models, then combined the wisdom I’d learned through the countless individuals I'd met through the years who had finally broken the addiction cycle, and applied those precepts to my own life! The Program that broke the 12+ year excessive drinking cycle in my own life wasn't on paper, it was in my mind and heart!
I've Authored 5 books and in 2017 created the spiritually based 91 day program Epic Life Solutions for hurts, habits and hangups endorsed and utilized in 178 Countries serving more than 8 million members. I founded Students 4 Epic Life and have spoken to 10s of thousands of students about the dangers of alcohol use.
I HAVE VICTORY NOW is specifically for learning how to moderate or abstain from alcohol and utilizes Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Spiritual Precepts and Neuroscience along with personalized Peak Performance Coaching. This confidential program can be utilized anywhere and will fit all schedules. In 49 days we target and focus on: MINDSET/ VISION AND GOAL SETTING/ FORGIVENESS/ PHYSICAL AND MENTAL HEALTH/ SPIRITUALITY/ SUSTAINABILITY
This Program is for men.. Especially Elite Minded/ High Achieving/ Determined and committed men.. The Program is structured.. Bonus*** The Spouses may opt in at no additional cost and receive Peak Performance Coaching with live virtual calls from my wife Felicia. The spouse will receive videos on forgiveness, resentment, healing and purpose! (NOTE: Success rates increase by 42% when the Spouses are involved in any way)
I grew up in a small town called Mt. Olive, NC. I have a brother who's 5 years younger than myself. I grew up with my grandparents and great uncles living across the street from us. I grew up working on the farm with the chickens, family garden, raising pigs, or working mainly in the 9-acre peach orchard. I grew up going to my grandpa’s store in Mt. Olive to “work” with and hang out with him. My mom taught school, and my dad worked with the maintenance department for the county schools. My grandma was a retired WWII Army Nurse and retired from community health nursing for Duplin County. We would all go to the beach for summer breaks when peaches were not in season or between varieties, or when the cold would kill them with early cold springs.
What little did people know was the abuse that happened behind closed doors. I can remember very vividly at the age of 5 seeing my daddy push my mom down into an open hot oven and her being 9 months pregnant. I remember very vividly hearing a voice that said to me, “This is NOT how a man is supposed to treat a woman/wife.” After hearing this, I remembered saying to myself, "Okay," and I turned to walk away to go play. From this point on, this type of physical abuse became more frequent and severe through the years and the verbal abuse onslaught. From this time until basically I was a senior in High School, we never knew the “mood” Daddy was going to come home from work in. We always walked around on eggshells.
I remember as I was getting older, and in middle school on, I would push Mama out of Daddy’s way and get in his face screaming at him that I hated his guts and wish he’d leave, that we would be so much better off without him. I would cuddle up with my brother, and we would cry and hold each other. I would run and all the family attorney and cry and beg him to call the cops for me... Daddy would come running and find me in the upstairs part of our house. I would get in the car and drive to the pond to get away from all the screaming, yelling, and hitting. As we also got older, I noticed an adult beverage “alcohol” was in the picture and when it came into the picture things got worse, and I could see moods and tempers get worse. I came to hate this drink that had a part in destroying my family.
During the middle school years, I would spend the night at friends' houses to get away and see what a real family was supposed to be like. But I wouldn’t go very often because frankly I was afraid of what would happen to Mama and Adam while I was gone. In high school, my pain was great by my senior year, and I started not to care about what happened in life and went to parties and a place called Lake Artesia. There were parties, dancing, and drinking. I started drinking myself on the weekends. It started out once in a while and then by my senior year became an every weekend occurrence. My senior year, I was dating a guy and broke up with him. I didn’t want to date anyone. My senior year for spring break we went on our senior trip to the Bahamas. My girlfriend and I made a pact with each other that we would take turns drinking and not separate from one another. Well, that went straight out the window; we went to the first party, and they separated us, and we couldn’t find each other, and then it was on from there. The next morning, one of the guys I’d been friends with since 6th grade brought my underwear to me the next day at our door. I looked at him and said, "What’s this for?" He said, "You don’t remember?" I said, "No, if I did I wouldn’t ask you." He just turned and walked away. I closed the door sitting on my bed with my friend and cried.
I didn’t remember anything. Later found out that we had sex (I lost my virginity that way). I was so numb, mad and just felt totally violated. I’d made a promise to myself when I was younger that I would be a virgin when I got married, it was something special that I wanted to give to my husband. From this point on in the trip, I was numb and stayed with girls and tried to have a good time on the rest of the trip. On the way home, I remember going up to this guy and telling him that I forgave him and hoped that one day he wouldn’t have to experience it with his daughter. The rest of my senior year, I dove myself into my schoolwork, time with my granny, and drank on the weekends and went to parties. The night of high school graduation, I went to the beach with another couple and drank that whole weekend, crying to myself, laying on the beach at night looking up to the stars just crying out!
After that graduation weekend, I went back home and made a promise and pact to myself and God that I wouldn’t ever drink again. I rededicated my life to Christ and got re-baptized. I saw that if I didn’t stop, I would end up like my parents if not worse. I didn’t want that for my life.
On the day that I was leaving for college, my dad announced that he was leaving my mom (me being 17, not quite 18—2 weeks shy) .... I said, "Well, this is the best present I could get…too bad you waited so long instead of ruining all the years we’ve lived in hell with you." I left for college and moved on with my life. It was when the movie Edward Scissorhands came out in 1990 that I couldn’t quit crying and knew that I needed help.
I went to counseling with a counselor at Mt Olive College and saw him for several months a couple of times a week. From this point, I began to love myself and got on a growth path to improve myself. I dated and married a guy, and we were together for a total of about 20 years. From 1999 to 2010, I was in the Amway business and got on a MAJOR self-help program of reading books and listening to at that time tapes/CDs and meeting with a mentor weekly. I was HUNGRY for growth and wanted to be a better and BEST ME!!! A lot happened, and I ended up leaving my first husband.
3 months later, Clay and I got reunited and started seeing each other. I knew that Clay had an alcohol issue but wasn’t aware of pill addiction. So, from April of 2011 until Jan. 2014, I dealt with a whole new ballgame that I’d never experienced to the degree and depth that it was. I was 40 years old that year when we got together and was thrust into a world of a hurricane of addictions.
In 2012, I was 41 years old and teaching school myself and finished my MBA then we had our 1st child in 2012 and she had major health issues. I was worn out. Clay's drinking and drug issues continued to grow and worsen…. Jan. 2014 on a Friday I ended up having him locked up. When he got out, I’d had help from a girlfriend at church who helped me move out back into my momma's house. I ended up getting an emergency Ex-parte order against him to protect me and our daughter. We had court dates, and he would show up totally drunk, and the judge would put him in jail for contempt of court. In April 2014, Clay had a friend take him to a regeneration center. I would continue to stay away and have no contact with him but through friends who kept me abreast of what was going on. In May of 2014, I went to see Clay after a heaviness that came upon me to go see him. From that visit on, we started growing and working together to overcome what we’d been through. When he graduated from the place in Oct. 2014, we renewed our wedding vows before leaving the property.
From this point, he came home, and we moved into a rental home and had a lot of growing together and learning to do. So, it began our journey of recovery, growth, and overcoming. To help give other couples hope and a road map of what we’d been able to do.
At 44 I had our 2nd child and then decided to make a career change and get out of teaching and started selling life insurance. During this time, we started Epic Life Solutions and wrote books together. Now, we are embarking on I Have Victory Now and helping even more people give them a road map, stretching people to help them grow and overcome just as we have done.